Category Archives: groupthink

How can I catch up!!?? No chance.

I will refrain from any ‘apology’ for being away so long from my posts. After all, an apology rather presumes some dependence or anticipation for my loquaciousness. HA! Who was waiting on me!!!? SO… Let us move on!!

The point is…. HELLLO!!! I have missed YOU!
Okay, okay. So it may be true that I actually have no time to miss each of you individually (or even, for that matter, in small groups) but I think of you OFTEN. I think of experiences unshared and I want to get back on the bandwagon as soon as possible! It may or may not be with this note. Consider this note a Wave Hello, and a Kiss Blown!!

I am about to start my grad school traineeship. What does this mean? (Besides.. yeeee.. next step to making my next transition real!!) This means that the part-time corporate gig (32 hrs/wk) which has given me 3 day weekends (for ‘study’) may have to become even less. And that will mean less income, and MUCH higher prices for my benefits (everything X3!) But… Maybe I am really ready. Maybe I am ready to start draining my savings, so that I can feel engulfed in moving towards my next, my preferred, my ‘encore’ career! (My heart is there… moving away from my cubicle!! Moving towards licensure and my private practice.)

I have more to share. More that has become part of my daily re-calibration about who I am. I am still processing.
But since I am Waving Hello… I will write another entry with the latest self-discovery.

Blessings!! I would HUG each of you if I could!!



On the cusp.. Did you miss it?

What does living on the cusp of ‘my life has just begun’ really feel like?  Do many people even have a clue?  Even ever have a chance to notice? Probably not, because how rare it is to notice a beginning… at the beginning!?

Doesn’t this experience, of major life transition, really belong only to 14 yr olds entering high school?  No! matter of fact, they don’t even have a chance of noticing it.

But certainly to 18-19 year olds leaving the confines of predictable schooling and parental oversight, right?  Again.. how many 18 year olds notice their interior experience?
For this is wholly an interior experience!  Shoot… the frontal lobe isn’t even fully developed until 25, so it would be much later yet (if ever) to use the capacity for the complex cognitive layer that can handle “what do I think of what I think they think of me?”. (Hell. How many adults do that one???)

I don’t think it is till we’re about 29 that we first have a retrospective experience of looking back and thinking… Wow, that’s when my life really started… Or, …what a turning point. It was all different after that.

Yet, right now, fully conscious, I find myself living a cusp (liminal) experience.  I am still firmly (4/5ths?) grounded in where I have been up until recently (earnin’ my buck from the corporate gig… and thank god, for the time being, still doing so).  I also fully find that I am not only looking over the ridge at the next version of who I am, but that 1/5th (or more) of me is already moving into/resonating with/vibrating in/BEING that new reality that I am transitioning to!

If in all of this process I can do something uniquely valuable, I think it would be the ability to NOTICE (and report) THE LANDSCAPE as I progress. Notice and record.

I am finding out how valued this reflection is: of ‘what the landscape looks like’, ‘See, it’s safe! (Look, here I am!)’.  For all of those coming along behind me… Possibly younger.  Possibly newer at this. Charge on.  And if you can… Notice.  Notice what it is like to be YOU in this moment, in this experience!



Corporate-Spiritual-Community Life

I’m beginning to come back around to the fact that others are open to the idea, the truth that

There is no Separation
There is no distinction
There is no isolation.

But .. where is my passion?
My conviction?

I know these things.
I know the infinitude of the human be-ing
I know.
How I know,
I do not know.
But I know.

–Is this
Like I used to know

that Jesus died for me?????

I feel I HAVE to believe…
That I can trust others’ hearts.
That in them, I can find refuge within the corporate shell
with my cohorts
my friends
my heartlinks


Posted by on July 24, 2007 in corporate life, Quandaries


What a difference a day (or ….a soul) makes…

… suddenly… we are fortunate enough to find ourselves engulfed in good souls. Good hearts. Good intellects!! From the quagmire and despondency of the previous weeks, this, I must point out, is a blessing. A Blessing. A Spark that Cleaves to our soul!

((Okay. so the crap that has been happening… the atmosphere, the hopelessness, and the mandates.. I admit my complicity of not being able to propose a better approach. Or confront authority. What is it? Primarily the first.))

We now have tangible progress under our belts as well as in our sights. We know what we are doing and where we are going, and for once… it feels feasible!

And I have to give great thanks for the experience of the last few days. Minds are released and unstrung. Hearts beat joyfully. Laughter is created. And enjoyed. By all.

What makes the difference? Vision. Deep belief. Connections. A joyful heart.
My heart soars. I honor you L.S.
I thank you for the blessing you are to my heart.
Regardless anything else.
You bless.
My heart.


Ignorance on your part does not equal…

…a freak-out panic, I-have-to-make-your-hallucination-true emergency on mine!Corporations.Managers.Wholey Chrap! Their brains work positively differently than ‘normal people’!! Especially those managers who are ‘bonus level’/director/avp. Those who are probably gonna get a nice bonus if we meet the project deadline that THEY set. (The people doing the work did estimates, but that turned out to be “just nice, thanks honey” news to them. Their deadline won. And it smacks of calendar-goal-bonus related!) Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by on June 15, 2007 in corporate life, groupthink, Quandaries


It Matters..

It matters, what each of us thinks, what each of us cares about. It matters… and it is seems at times so overwhelming… all the different things to care about.
In ferreting through all of the important cares that I could perhaps focus on here… my mind whirls. I agonize. I want to land on something “nice”. But I’m inflamed by what I’ve read or learned and think I should vent.
What serves us? Finding others to gripe with? Finding others who might motivate us to take action in areas of concern? Finding someone who gives us a bit of joy? If someone makes us laugh, is that any less healing then joining a march? Are we healing our world any less with a laugh than with a raised sign?
How important is it that we laugh? I have a suspicion that it is immensely important!

I have a tiny ember of a hope that I can serve my co-earth-habitants with laughter.

Right now I am experiencing an extreme (and I restrain the need to set that word at 56 pt font!) amount of stress at work. My self-employed boyfriend questions the motivation and manipulation of ‘the establishment’. He’s currently 2500 miles away, but it isn’t that distance that makes it interesting to try to explain corporate life to him. It is the fact that he has been self-employed for about 30 years, and the way the Corporation behaves and treats its own has changed so drastically mostly in the past 10-20 years.

As I talk about how I could almost care less about the corporation (don’t get me started), about the ‘project du jour’, what I DO care about is the folks I work with. My colleagues whom I like, love, adore, appreciate… these are the exact folks that I dread the possibility of letting down. These are the exact folks that ’cause’ my stress. BUT as I explain this situation to my bf, I begin to see an analogy that he also starts picking up on: In the same way that soldiers are deeply dedicated to fighting a war, to going back to a war, to not leaving a war .. it is NOT about the war. It is NOT about the issue on the political table. It IS about our buddies. It IS about staying by their side, about not letting them down, about not letting their price be for naught.