In the last few days I have begun suddenly to think that I was, instead of being too hasty, that I maybe I was reaching the point of ‘hanging on too long’ in regards to my elderly ailing beloved 15-1/2year old Sophie. I watched her yesterday – as I have been watching her closely over the past week or two. Asking her, sometimes out loud, “Is this too much, honey?” “Have you had enough?” But of course, no audible response came. And there was still detectible if subdued pleasure she experienced in my company.
So was my attention yesterday, while Sophie was occasionally moving from inside to outside, occasionally falling and being unable to pick herself up, and then she would wander a tiny portion of the yard – was she trying to decide whether the pain of crouching was worth the desire to defecate or urinate? Did she just collapse on her hind legs or did she mean to ‘take a break’ and sit a spell?