Mirrors and Things we learn

04 Oct

Realizing how we were ‘done’
Comparing painful recollections

Come to find out
he used
The identical script for reeling each of us in

The intimacy
So quick
so amazing
so easy

From a “tell me something about yourself”

oh, such music, to we who are so hungry to be known

A soulmate
A friend we’d always dreamt of

He reflects our deepest values

“you make me look at myself”

“I’m being such a baby, but you’re helping me change”
“I’ve never felt this connection with anyone”

“I’ve never opened up to anyone like this before”

Only you/only I/only she

have really drawn him out

We think, and he humbly acknowledges, ‘soul-mate’!

He is a perfect mirror to us of what we crave

… Be careful with that mirror.

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Posted by on October 4, 2007 in recovery, Relationships, sociopath


4 responses to “Mirrors and Things we learn

  1. Nina Ferrell

    October 12, 2007 at 7:39 am

    Thank you for your words. I am one of countless women who are trying to get over one of these guys.
    I wrote this:
    Since every word can hold betrayal

    And threaten all that went before

    Since one false move is disavowal

    And one untruth one more closed door

    Since you and I are mirrors

    And so alike in all we see

    Know that your heart and all you feel

    Are brightly mirrored back to me

  2. terraflora

    October 12, 2007 at 9:48 am

    Nina, thanks so much for visiting and most for sharing!! We do so learn by what we see mirrored back, don’t we! tf

  3. joel trevino

    November 10, 2007 at 6:32 pm

    It is very difficult for me to understand the things that I have done in the past to be wrong. I have only done what I ‘believed’ was needed to survive.

    A portion of my mind tells me now, after much reflection, that “Yes” what I had done was wrong, immoral and perhaps could be even construed as being evil.

    Terra, I (though make no assumptions I am not a psychologist) believe that I truly am one of the 3.1 million people that reside within the U.S. that suffer from “Anti-Social Personality Disorder,” or as it is more informally known as a “Sociopath”.

    Currently I have been remiss in the writing of my blog, because my thoughts have been well for a lack of a better way to phrase it ‘ordered’.

    I will not make excuses as to what ‘that individual’ has done to you; for I have done perhaps the very same thing or worse in the past. Currently I am seeking therapy, help and counseling for my issues.

    If you have not read all of my posts, and have only seen that one of “The Psychopath Next Door”, please go back and understand why I believe I fall under that very auspice.

    Although I fit the profile to a “T” as it were, I lack the true sociopath’s sense of fear. Or, rather the lack there of, of it. Because, I am now very frightened of the monster I used to be and really do not know how to change. As is often said “Habits once formed are the hardest chains to throw off.”


    Though in conclusion I would like to thank you for taking the time to post a response on my blog. I am trying to be more diligent in my chronicling of my path to ‘stability’.

  4. terraflora

    November 10, 2007 at 6:52 pm

    Joel – My heart does go out to you as you journey through your own healing. And I suspect you are in a greater sense healing than any sociopath I’ve known or read about.. because you seem to have remorse! This is the key-to-humanity that no sociopath has!!
    Blessings. Take it slow, do your work. You are doing what you need to do.


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